A trap is only a trap if you don’t know about it. If you know about it, it’s a challenge.

China Miéville

Realizing your own weakness is almost the most amazing that can happen in life. Once you’re honest with yourself, nobody can hurt you. This way leads only up.

It’s a fact that you won’t be the best!

There’s always somebody who calculates huge numbers in his head, cooks better, would defeat you in a fight. “In a gym there’s always a guy who uses your maximum weights for a warm up”. On the internet people prefer to say that “there’s always an asian who can do this better”.

The idea of striving to be on top poisons people. While we’re small we hear how once we grow up we can be and do whatever you can only dream of. But the person grows up and realizes how not-so-unique he or she is. Which logically leads to a depression, long as your own life. There’re even fixed expressions like “middle age crisis”. Most of people accept the fallen world and crawl, feeling kind of dragged in fact, in the direction of crematorium or cemetery.

Scary pretty world

I think Internet brought this aspect to a whole new level. Now we have a chance to observe a beautiful life of other people in a matter of few clicks – polished profile pictures, witty tweets, carefully manipulated instagram photos, edited life in personal blogs, etc.


Oh.. so many reasons to consider your own life a crap now, isn’t it?

Look at those genius kids from news  article who invent environmental gadgets at age of 16, or girls who look like goddesses “just woken up ^_^ #nofilter”, or on-the-way-to-billionaire a guy who graduated school same year as you.

How do you feel?

Do you have this comparison in your head?

If you don’t, well… though I’m trying to seem like an objective wise person in general and be happy for you… here.. I’m just very jealous )

Because I do. All the time. Though now I prefer to refer to it as “I did” and not an “I do”, and hope it won’t be another illusion.

For years, I’ve been trying different activities, thinking that doing them would make me a better person. Some in fact did, but some of them were an attempt to catch up with somebody, because I thought (not consciously) that by doing something I’ll be closer to the image of somebody I admire, which eventually would make me like myself more and be proud. What really happens.. I failed so many times.. and the feeling of failure drove me from my goals even further away.

What looked for somebody like i’m doing something quite decent, in my own perception was shit and was making me the lest loved person in my own eyes.

Do you feel slightly better about yourself? Funny how it works, isn’t it? )

How to be the best

Well.. the trick is.. you are.

You are the best version of yourself.

Are you a better person your were 2 years ago? Yes? Then you’re already better than the best.

There’s no more trap anymore. Now it’s a challenge – a challenge to be own better self, and not better than or even like somebody.

picture from here

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